Circles and Squares

Posted by Mandy on February 12th, 2008 filed in Musings

When I taught middle school, there was a young girl who came to me and asked me why, when she worked so hard to be nice and friendly and a good friend to others, she was still on the outside.  She saw her other friends being invited to things in front of her, yet she was not; she was a smart, funny girl who had a different take on the world than those around her, but sometimes things just didn’t seem to work for her and she was on the fringe.  Does it get better, she asked?  Feeling as if there is something wrong with you, feeling lonely even when you’re in a group of people?

I  wanted to tell her that it did get better, but I didn’t want to lie to her because I don’t think it does.  What changes is how we learn how to deal with it, but I didn’t want to lie to her about that, either, because the feelings of loneliness and unease… they don’t really change all that much.   I think about her, sometimes, when I feel the same things she was struggling with.